Receiving a diagnosis for your child is devastating. You may find yourself obsessing over the fact that one doctor says it’s autism while another calls it PDD NOS and still another thinks it’s Aspergers. But the fact is that raising a child on the autism spectrum is difficult and it has very little to do with what you call it.
Imagine a scenario where you have a two-year-old with curiously long fingers. Worried that there might be something wrong, you take your child to a trusted physician. The physician examines your child and informs you that he has a condition known as spindle fingers, and that this means he has a natural ability to play musical instruments.
You are so thrilled with the news and can’t wait to enroll him in music lessons. In the mean time (since he’s only two), you buy him a toy xylophone, drum set and flute and watch proudly as he bangs and twiddles away. It doesn’t matter to you that others think it just sounds like noise; you know you have a musician-in-the-making!
As the years go by you foster and encourage your son’s musical ability. He has taken preference to the piano so you invest in private lessons, listen to piano concertos together and attend performances of famous concert pianists. You have explained to your son about his condition and his natural gift. He is proud and so are you.
A few years later you run into the physician. You proudly tell him about your son’s musical accomplishments and how fortunate he was to be born with spindle fingers. The doctor smiles at you and tells you that he made the whole thing up. That there is no such condition as spindle fingers. You are shocked. How can that be? He is so talented!
The doctor explains to you that the power of belief is very strong. Since you believed in your son so fiercely, you barely heard the mistakes. You knew he was going to be great so you gave him endless encouragement. And he felt your belief. He saw it in your eyes and it inspired him. He knew because of his fingers that he was talented. He felt proud and knew that he could do it. It was your unwavering faith that allowed him to be the best he could.
I hope this little scenario helped you to see that the best thing to do is to forget about the labels and ignore the judgments. Know that your child is unique and fascinating and incredibly special. Encourage him. Give him the tools he needs to succeed. Stand by his side and never lose faith in him. Teach him all that you can and watch as he exceeds everyone’s expectations!
Read the full article by Jené Aviram or browse others at www.nlconcepts.com
Stephanie Carr
Student Clinician, Florida International University
